September 1, 2022 by Christopher Hooker

Parents Really Matter

Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Our children will, in the course of time, present all kinds of issues to us as parents rearing them. We cannot expect children to be neat, convenient, or properly behaved with little (or inconsistent) guidance from parents.

It’s no secret that parents play a vital role in the early development of their children. But what exactly does this involve? And why is it so important?

In her amazing TEDTalk seminar, science journalist Helen Pearson points out that engagement and interest from parents in those first few years of life is strongly linked to children going on to do well at school later on. Taking an interest in our children, and spending time playing with them in their formative years, is crucial for helping them to develop essential skills such as literacy and numeracy.

Ms. Pearson also highlights the importance of parents reading and talking to their children from a young age. This helps to build vocabulary and communication skills, which are vital for success in school and in life.

Parental involvement is crucial in laying the foundations for a child’s future success. So what can parents do to ensure they are as involved as possible in their children’s development? Well, there are lots of things! Here are some ideas:

Spend time playing with your child every day
Talk to your child often, and encourage them to talk to you
Read together as often as you can
Help your child to learn about and explore the world around them
Encourage your child to try new things and to persevere when they find something difficult
Be there for your child – show them love and support every day.
Put your cell phone down–far away from you and your child while you are engaged.

All of these activities help to create a strong bond between parent and child, and allow parents to provide crucial support and guidance as their children grow and learn. So if you’re looking for ways to help your child thrive, start by getting involved in their early development! If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! Like us on Facebook to follow our stories for news and updates. We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our new hours of operation are 6:45 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday.

August 1, 2022 by Christopher Hooker

Separation Anxiety and Your Children

Most parents know the difficulty of separation anxiety, a normal developmental phenomenon which comes and goes through all stages of childhood. We’ve experienced the crying that begins as soon as you make a motion to the door, and felt the primal sense of guilt and worry about the “abandonment” of our children that comes with leaving them, even in the best hands. Separation anxiety is common in preschool age children and it’s a struggle for both parents and children. It often comes and goes over many months even when the child is being left with the same people he/she has been cared for regularly.

The moment of parting can be a very difficult time for both the child and the parents. Many kids feel betrayed or scared when they have to part with their parents, and it’s not easy– especially for first-time parents– to leave a sobbing child behind. Parents often feel helpless and guilty during this time. This very normal experience is important to go through even though it can be extremely stressful for everyone.

Here are 9 steps that might help you and your child with separation anxiety:

The first step is acknowledging that the feeling is normal. It’s okay for your child to feel sad or scared when you leave them, and it’s important to talk about those feelings. Validating their emotions will help your child feel understood. Equally, it’s okay for you to miss them and to admit to yourself that your day would be happier with them.

The second step is to talk about the place you’re leaving them and the people you’re leaving them with. Explain to your child what they can expect when they come to a sitter’s, or Creekside Kids, or when leaving them home. Describe the activities they will do and the people they will meet, so that they can begin to concentrate on the adventure ahead of them, knowing that they’ll see you afterward. The shifting of gears in your child’s mind will help you accept the separation, too.

The third step is to make a good-bye ritual. This can be something as simple as a hug and a kiss before you leave. This will help your child feel loved and secure, and will reaffirm to you that your child isn’t losing any love for you as you part ways.

The fourth step is to be consistent. Separation anxiety can be triggered by changes in routine, so it’s important to be consistent with your drop-off and pick-up times. One of the best ways to make your child understand and believe you will return is to consistently turn up when you say you will. Because this isn’t always possible, it’s important to acknowledge when you are inconsistent. Make sure they understand that it had nothing to do with any tantrum they had or accident; let your child know that sometimes, Mommies and Daddies fail to keep their word, and all we can do is try to make it up to each other.

The fifth step is to give your child a comfort item. This can be a blanket, stuffed animal, or toy that they can keep with them during the day. It should be something they can readily associate with their family and connect them, even when you’re apart.

The sixth step is to stay positive. When you say goodbye, tell your child that you’ll see them later and that you’re looking forward to hearing about their day. As much as it may help your child, this will help give you the strength to leave.

The seventh step is to avoid sneak departures. While this helps you avoid drama, this will only increase your child’s anxiety, and feelings of betrayal. And kids catch on, and it will make separations that much harder. You should never try to outsmart your child, because sooner or later, they’re going to beat you at your own game.

The eighth step is to make sure the caregiver is prepared. Before you leave, introduce your child to the caregiver and explain what they can expect during the day. All kids, at some point, learn to say, “You’re not the boss of me.” But it can reassure a child to see and hear you making certain that their special needs are in place and that they haven’t been forgotten in the hand-off shuffle. You can also ask that the caregiver send pictures or texts when the child calms and settles in. Some children take only 2-3 minutes and others take 30 minutes or more. Each child is different.

The ninth step is to be patient. Separation anxiety is a normal part of development and it will eventually go away. These steps may not help immediately, so don’t give up if there’s pushback. Consistent work towards normalizing separations is possible if you remain consistent and don’t give in to tantrums or parental anxieties.

Sometimes, it helps to talk to other parents. Separation anxiety is a common experience, so talking to other parents can be helpful. You can share tips and find support from others who are going through the same thing. If your child’s anxiety is severe or interfering with their daily life, it may be time to seek help from a mental health professional. Seek help from a counselor or child’s mental health professional if the anxiety persists.

Separation anxiety is a normal part of development and it will eventually go away. In the meantime, these 11 steps may help you and your child through this difficult time. If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! Like us on Facebook to follow our stories for news and updates. We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our new hours of operation are 6:45 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday.

July 1, 2022 by Christopher Hooker

Young Children and Grief

Our preschool-aged kids are precious and although we worry about their fragility, they are much stronger than we understand. We want to watch over them as much as we can, but part of how we cope with life is learning that things don’t always go our way. And this is very true about death. Death is a universal issue for all and incorporating the harsh reality of it into our lives is best done proactively and with loving reassurance.

I’ve recently been back East for the funeral of my older sister, Patty, the eldest of my siblings. There’s been a balance between ritual and chaos from moment-to-moment, and it’s been a struggle to process my feelings at times. I accept that I’ll never get a chance to say all of the things I wanted to say to her and know that I will miss her for the rest of my life. My niece and nephew who are both in their early 20s were never educated about death and have never had anyone close to them pass away, so it was even harder than it could have been to face the unfortunate death of their mother.

My own two girls (who are now in their teens) have not had a life sheltered from death. Since before they were small enough to understand the finality of death, they have been allowed to experience grief for pets. The first pet to die was a fish—eaten by the cat while we were on vacation. It was a small introduction to the finality of death and while we read books about the death of a pet and had a funeral ceremony for the fish after the loss, I realized I should have been exposing the children in a very gentle way through books before they experienced the first loss. I’ve made sure to address the issue over the years proactively with books and discussions and gently allowing them to experience the loss of a few pets. Since then, they’ve also had the very real grief of schoolmates and relatives passing on—many all too soon. We have taught them the rituals of grief and honoring the departed as part of the process of recovery. We hope we modeled it well for them and that they will be ready for that day when they lose a parent.

In trying to protect their kids, parents can sometimes do misguided things such as try to replace a lost guppy with another one, or even try to do this with a cat or bird! This practice is misguided in that it does not allow the child to process through their love for a specific pet. It’s also very unlikely to work. Others tell their children that the pet moved away to a farm somewhere, which leaves the child lost and without closure. We fear what the burden of grief will do to our children at such a tender age. But grief is part of living. A child that never experiences death in their young life will have no tools to process grief when they grow older.

For a generation of kids, they first experienced the concept of death and grief with THE LION KING. As films go, THE LION KING is traumatic, but a valuable first lesson in death: kids see a child interacting with their dead parent, unable to wake them, and the absence of that parent’s protection makes in their young life. Eventually, the child grows into their own agency, and triumphs– and that’s an excellent first look at recovery. BAMBI also loses his mother and is consoled by his father.

It’s important that kids understand what death is without confusion and without platitudes that make the adults around them feel better. Death is natural. Losing a pet will naturally devastate a young child. Losing an uncle or grandparent is hard, but it’s an important first step before the people even closer to them pass on.

It’s also important that kids understand that their grief is valid. Adults and other kids can be impatient with a grieving child. Your child needs to know that a person’s grief– whether their grief or someone else’s– is not on a timetable. A grieving child needs patience and respect to move beyond their grief.

There’s a couple of books we’d like to recommend for parents who are encountering their child’s grief for the first time. For the child, Saying Goodbye to Lulu by Corrine Demas gives a relatable account of the grief cycle, as a child experiences it. For parents, we recommend “It’s Okay That You’re Not Okay”, by Megan Devine. for what it can teach both the grieving and those around the grieving about how our culture doesn’t process grief properly.

If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! Like us on Facebook to follow our stories for news and updates. We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our new hours of operation are 6:45 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday.

June 1, 2022 by Christopher Hooker

Teaching Your Kids About Swimming and Dangers

Summertime is here! As our kids turn to wading pools, swimming pools and creeks to cool down this hot summer, it’s the right time to consider the dangers; specifically, the threat of drowning, and understanding the missed indicators of danger to your child. Drowning is thought to be a loud, noisy, splashy moment; in reality, most drownings are quiet and sudden.

Understandably, drowning is something we worry about, but also believe we can prevent with casual supervision. But statistically speaking, children younger than one-year-old are more likely to drown at home. Without the proper training, it’s not easy for a parent to recognize the signs that their child is in trouble. A splashing, playful kid can look just as in danger as one in trouble if you can’t read the signs.

The signs that a child is drowning are mostly about their posture in the water and are very subtle. They can happen right in front of people who don’t know what to look for. Here are the common signs of a child in water distress:

Gasping — children with clear lungs can speak as they swim; a gasping child may be taking on water and struggling for breath.
Mouth — if your child’s mouth is at water level, that can be an indication that the child is having trouble keeping their head above water. If your child’s mouth is hovering at the water level, your child may be in need of rescue.
Arms — if a child’s arms are out to the side, it’s an indication that they aren’t actively trying to swim. If the arms seem to flap like wings, it may be an attempt to signal for help that is being thwarted by the water overtaking them.
Head — when a child’s head is tilted back as opposed to level, that’s a possible sign they may be in trouble and taking on water. Equally, it can just be floating– if the child is active, they are likely okay; if they are still with a tilted-back head, they may need assistance.
Vertical — if your child is vertical in the water, there isn’t enough motion to suggest they are in control of their swimming and may be in trouble.

A child with a vertical body with arms out to the side and a mouth at the water line is definitely in need of assistance. There are also dangers that can come after a swim: dry drowning and secondary drowning.

Dry drowning means that you can drown far from any body of water. You can drown in a gulp of water that causes your child’s vocal chords to constrict. Water never reaches the lungs, but neither does the oxygen they need to survive.

Secondary drowning is when water does get into the lungs, and takes up residence, leading to fluid build up and death. A child saved from drowning in a body of water can still go to sleep and later drown in their own fluids.

We can never provide absolute safety where swimming is concerned. Swimming with trained lifeguards on duty is the safest way to take your child swimming. As parents, we need to have awareness and vigilance, and teach our friends and kids to look out for each other, too. Please feel free to pass this blog on to all of your friends with kids who enjoy swimming! We want this summer to be safe for you and your kids.

May 1, 2022 by Christopher Hooker

The Five Different Types of Preschools: An Overview

How does a parent decide what kind of preschool their child should attend to begin their education? When parents first start looking for their child’s preschool, they are usually looking for a school that will replicate the kind of focus that they have at home. They’re looking for a ‘good fit’ for their child — a place their child can do well in, and grow confident in themselves.

If you aren’t aware, there are many different kinds of preschools for your child, including the ‘sit and watch television’ daycare models (no, thank you). But there are five basic archetypes for actual preschools dedicated to giving your child a learning experience with direct supervision. The spectrum seems to run on a line going from rigorous academics to exploring a child’s potential through child-led exploration to simple free play. At Creekside Kids, we’re not on the extreme end of either side of the spectrum–we are in the middle, taking the best of each method depending upon the needs of the actual children in our care.

What are the five different types of preschools?

Academic-Based — these schools are most focused on fitting your square peg child into the round hole. To quote Sarah Punkoney of stayathomeeducator.com, “Academic or skills-based programs are teacher directed and managed. This means that children have limited choice in the learning that takes place and how that learning happens.” This approach molds the child on a predetermined path. Although our view of this may make it sound harsh, please bear in mind that many children thrive on this approach– but what concerns us at Creekside is the holistic development of the whole child.

Montessori — the difference between the Montessori approach and Academic-based learning is that the child chooses how to squeeze their square peg potential into that round hole. The lesson plans are customized by the child’s aptitudes and interests. The Montessori system has a marvelous reputation for giving children a better chance. Being self-directed is very important in this model–especially as kids mature.

Waldorf — to stick to our analogy, the Waldorf model looks to find a universal shape that all children can fit into, building well-rounded children who are mindful and have received personal attention along the way. The Waldorf model has a specific scope and sequence for each grade and has great respect for rhythm and routine. The development of a child’s hands (physical health and growth), heart (non secular spiritual/social/emotional growth) and mind (academics, inquisitiveness and contemplative skills).

Reggio Emilia — this is Creekside’s holistic approach. In the analogy, this is about finding the precise shape for the child’s peg to fit, even if your child’s star-shape allows them to fit in a round hole. Play is greatly incorporated into lessons and is encouraged as a learning tool. It’s important to Reggio Emilia education to focus on finding that star-shaped hole to guide your child into their future, respecting their individual needs and giving them the kind of attention that translates into a sense of self-worth. In each Reggio Emilia or Reggio Emilia influenced school (like Creekside Kids) we ask who are the children in our care? Who are their families and what do they need/value? Then what community do they live in and how can we help the children develop into successful members of that community? We do this by observing how the children play, what they talk about, what they create through free art, etc. We then take their interests and build the ABCs and 123s into exploring those topics.

Play-Based — when academic preparation isn’t the concern, but learning social/emotional skills is, that is play-based preschool. While children may learn a few academics such as the alphabet song, counting to 10 or 20 and how to write their name, they do it without much pressure or guidance from educators. For the children, academic learning is done on their own terms and in their own time. You’ll see a lot of “centers” in the classroom such as “kitchen/house”, “library”, “sensory table”, “music” and “art”. At Creekside Kids, we have those centers too but we add in much more teacher interaction, experiments, exploratory play and focus not just on the social/emotional play approach.

All of these styles have merit and any might be right for your child. At Creekside Kids, we largely favor the Reggio Emilia approach with influence from the Play-Based approach and we pull from the routines and literacy methods of the Waldorf approach. We provide a combined approach because we feel it creates the greatest opportunities to respect what is unique and special in each child. If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! Like us on Facebook to follow our stories for news and updates. We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our new hours of operation are 6:45 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday.

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Parents Really Matter

Separation Anxiety and Your Children

Young Children and Grief

Teaching Your Kids About Swimming and Dangers

The Five Different Types of Preschools: An Overview

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