January 1, 2022 by Christopher Hooker

Social-Emotional well being for kids and parents in 2022

Would you define your child as a socially and emotionally healthy child? It’s important that our children learn to understand their feelings, and how to express them, and how to interact with the feelings of others. The National Association for the Education of Young Children defines socially and emotionally healthy children as demonstrating, and continuing to develop, several important behaviors and skills.

Socially and Emotionally Healthy kids:

Typically display a positive mood
Listen to and follow directions without reminding
Form close relationships with their caregivers and with other kids
Show an interest in the wellbeing of others
Can recognize, identify, and to some degree manage their own emotions
Can empathize with the emotions displayed by others
Can express their wishes and preferences clearly
Gain access to ongoing play and group activities
Are able to play, negotiate, and compromise with others

If you can only recognize some of the nine factors listed here in your child, you may need to talk with teachers and/or with a counselor. It’s also a good idea to ask teachers for feedback regarding how your child behaves when you aren’t around. It’s not unusual for children to behave one way at home and another at school.

Prevent Child Abuse America recommends six courses of action to promote social and emotional learning in your children during the summer, when they are out of preschool. They are:

Ask your child, “How are you feeling?” A simple check-in shows your children that their emotions matter and that you are concerned for their emotional wellbeing, as well as teach children to identify what their emotions are and how to appropriately express them.
Set up a Chore Chart for each week of summer break. Age-appropriate chores are a great way to build self-esteem and make a child feel valued, and that he/she is a contributing member of the household–not a guest or a pampered pet. You can use stickers to acknowledge when work is done especially well. Setting kids up with some responsibility can teach children self-reliance and the importance of following through. And, yes—even 3/4/5 year olds can do chores. They usually love doing them too!
Read a book with a Social Emotional Learning (SEL) component to your child. You can use stories that you read to help them understand SEL concepts in action. (Here’s a list from Differentiated Learning of 25 great books for SEL.) Make sure you discuss the motivations and actions of the characters. Some very useful SEL books include: Jubari Jumps, by Gaia Cornwall; Be Kind, by Pat Zietlow Miller & Jen Hill; and We’re All Wonders, by R. J. Palacio.
Teach your child cooperative learning games. Cooperative games where everyone seeks to win together help everyone in the game build their SEL, and particularly helps cultivate understanding and patience. (If you can find games that your child can in turn teach their siblings or friends to play, that’s even better– it prepares them to spread these ideas by modeling them!) For some recommended SEL games, see this list from Proud to be Primary.
Start a summer journal for your child. Small children can’t write a tome of their feelings, obviously, so as a bedtime event, write down the date on the page and then have them tell you some of the feelings they encountered today, and how they dealt with those feelings.
Set a summer goal for your child. Agree on an age-appropriate summer goal with your child and help them track their progress (perhaps as part of their summer journal). For example, your child may set a goal of being able to recognize the 26 letters in the alphabet and know most of their sounds by the end of the summer, or be able to consistently count to twenty correctly.

If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! Like us on Facebook to follow our stories for news and updates. We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our regular hours of operation are 6:30 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday; however, we have a shortened schedule during COVID of 7:00 am to 5:30 pm.

December 1, 2021 by Christopher Hooker

December and Helping Your Child Through Stress and Meltdowns

The Holiday Season is here! For many families, that includes letters to Santa, nighttime drives down streets with houses trimmed in Christmas lights, and anticipation of gifts and sweet traditions to come. It’s time for joy, family, and happiness.

But even though we mean for December to be full of joy, it’s also a tough time for many people. The expectations put on parents to be happy and make others happy can be brutal, especially for someone going through grief, anxiety, or depression. People fight over the silliest things, especially when we are (yet again) amid record-high COVID cases, job insecurity, and inflation.

We’ve all seen the recent rise of the ‘Karen’: the irrational woman who turns up on camera demanding the world behave to their specifications. (Or the ‘Ken,’ the male version, frequently given to resorting to violence when he doesn’t get his way.) With politics so polarized since the advent of social media, it’s effortless for a simple misunderstanding to turn into an unfortunate, ugly altercation. Some people walk out of their homes like ticking time-bombs, waiting for one perceived grievance to set them off. The holiday season only makes this more fraught with negative energy, which our children can feel and sometimes witness. Plus, none of us want to raise our children to become demanding, stressed-out people.

For that reason, we need to focus not just on the trappings of the season but also on the spirit of community and kindness that Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Rohatsu, and Solstice engender. We need to extend love and understanding to people who are upset and angry toward others — and we need to show this to our children.

Children can sense when people are stressed and upset; far better than we realize. Being a verbal role model for your children is the healthiest way to teach them how to handle big emotions. Talking to children about stress and labeling the actual emotions you or another person feels is critical to teach them how to accept, manage, and communicate their emotions; without tantrums. Helping your child label their feelings when they are mad is one of the best things you can do. One way to do this is to say, “Your face looks like this (show them),” “Your body is doing this (show them),” and “Your voice is doing this (show them).” “Are you feeling frustrated?” “Is your frustration turning into anger, or are you getting sad?” “How can I help you?”

If a meltdown occurs, find a moment to hold your child while they are still upset and rock them until they can breathe a bit, and then talk about the things mentioned above, going through the labeling process with them. Then, once calm is restored, talk about the feelings again and how they feel now. Reassure them that it is always okay to have big emotions and that it is essential to practice managing them. Be sure to say you are there to help them.

Conversely, if your child sees you have an argument or is angry/frustrated with someone, talk about it afterward. It’s okay to tell your child something like, “My chest felt tight, and I was squeezing my hands into fists. My voice got loud, and I said things I didn’t really mean. At first, I was frustrated with that person, and then I started getting angry because they wouldn’t listen to me. It didn’t feel good, and I felt a little out of control. I’m still learning to manage my big feelings, too, sometimes. I’m feeling better now, and I’m sorry that I did that in front of you. Would you like to talk about how you felt about it?”

It’s a BIG ask. But in the spirit of the holidays, try to reset people, young and old, who are disoriented (having a meltdown/very angry) with love and patience. By coaching and labeling those emotions and their physical effects, you will raise self-aware children.

For more resources, check out these valuable resources:

https://www.simplicityparenting.com/

https://www.mindfulmamamentor.com/blog/Resources/podcast/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b26fQNtr23Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9voQuCQDfg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZG16UY-u4KQ

November 1, 2021 by Christopher Hooker

Exploring The Outdoors In November

How often do you get out in the season and make an outing to mark the change in the weather? Do you have Winter, Spring, and Summer rituals for you and your family to bond together? With November’s arrival, there’s a great opportunity to get out in the crisp Autumn air of Colorado Springs and enjoy nature as a family.

Would you like to add in a ritual or two to observe the arrival of Autumn and the transition to Winter? These kind of rituals can be yearly traditions or just some good things for families with preschool-age children to enjoy with the weather turning:

Taking In a Spectacular Mountain View – Open all year long, the lift at the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo can give your family a bird’s-eye view of the city and mountains with Fall leaves in their full glory, as well as getting to see the animals as they prepare for winter.
Take a Hike – One great place for an Autumn hike is the Garden of the Gods Visitor & Nature Center. There’s loads to do and see for an active family! Even walking around your own neighborhood and collecting colored leaves is a treat for little ones.
One Last Taste of Summer – There’s something to be said for going into autumn by clinging to the dying embers of Summer! Try enjoying the last of the warm weather at local lakes such as Quail Lake and even Pueblo Reservoir.
Ride a Pony – If your kids are old enough to experience it, pony rides are available with local barns and tourism groups. Academy Riding Stables, Wishing Star Farm over in Ellicott, and others.
The Grandest Mile of Scenery in Colorado – There’s also Seven Falls (which is now owned by the Broadmoor) and has recently been refurbished. They have hiking trails, ziplines, and shops to enjoy.
Resort to Family Fun – Another fun idea is to go to the Cheyenne Mountain Resort in the evening and buy a S’mores packet to eat on the patio over your own personal fire. The kids can get hot chocolate while the adults have a more adult-oriented beverage if they choose. Views of the mountains are spectacular from there!
Jump-Start the Holidays – As a gear-up for Christmas, nearby Manitou Springs has an amusement park called The North Pole, which young kids love. There’s an area for small children as well as rides for older kids and adults. It recently reopened after the Covid closure and it’s a local favorite with many families.
Local Nature Center Visits – The Bear Creek Nature Center and the Fountain Creek Nature Center are both wonderful places to take young children and have many special programs for them all throughout the week.
Bicycling as a Family – There are numerous bike trails around town if your little one is ready for a mile or two along some of our beautiful trails.
Raking Leaves into a pile and simply letting your children (and dogs) jump into them over and over is such a simple treat. Here are treasured family photos of my eldest having a blast with just a simple pile of leaves.

Although all the trips to the zoo and the nature centers are wonderful, sometimes it is the simplest things that are the most profound.

If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! Like us on Facebook to follow our stories and for news and updates. We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our regular hours of operation are 6:30 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday; however, we have a shortened schedule during COVID of 7:00 am to 5:30 pm.

October 1, 2021 by Christopher Hooker

Why Playing With Costumes Is Good For Children

Halloween conjures images of children running through the streets as October arrives, going door-to-door in small groups. It’s uncertain if this year will produce much of a “Spooky Season” turnout, but we’ll bet that kids will still be dressing up in costumes, watching child-friendly monster movies, and enjoying candy and a few good scares.

The spooky season is fundamentally good for kids. It’s a staging ground for dealing with fear and anxiety only once a year so that kids have time to process what they learned (fear is survivable, and I’m going to be okay) and feel braver the following year. Kids learn to trust their community, but they also learn to look for outliers and inappropriate people within their community too.

Sometimes, your child will hang on to their spooky season costume just a little longer than expected. They’ll want to play in their costume deep into November. We encourage you to let them enjoy their costumes! Here’s why:

Costumes spark the imagination. A playworld surrounding a superhero costume can help a child develop problem-solving skills. The stories we learn as children generally involve a challenge to our happiness; kids will put on an outfit and invent their own challenges, only to defeat them.
Costumes help with skills development. Our children develop many different skills when they play in costume together. To play cooperatively and make a storyline that makes narrative sense, they must learn creative thinking and social skills. As given characters come with behavioral rules, they learn self-regulation skills, communication skills, language development, teamwork, cooperation, and sharing.
Costumes help children develop motor skills. The putting on and taking off of outfits can be somewhat hard to do, and children who play in costumes learn to work with velcro, buttons, and zippers.
Costumes allow children to examine themselves differently. Even very young children understand that a Fireman dresses differently than a soldier, and both are responsible for different things. Putting on the costume allows a child to imagine themselves in a different role. In this way, it inspires empathy, too.

Ultimately, there will come a time when the kids have to give up costume play or restrict it to certain portions of the day– in part to preserve the work it can create for you, and in part to maintain their costume if they truly love wearing it. But try to let them hold on a little longer if there’s something on their mind; perhaps they are working out a mystery in their mind we can’t yet understand!

If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our regular hours of operation are 6:30 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday; however, we have a shortened schedule during COVID of 7:00 am to 5:30 pm.

September 1, 2021 by Christopher Hooker

No Pressure Potty Training

Toilet training is an essential step in a child’s development. However, it’s easy for a child to acquire complex emotions about their bladder and bowel control. Potty training can be fraught with anxiety or come naturally as daybreak, depending on the child and the approach.

Potty training can begin when a child is between 18 and 24 months but can take longer in children with special developmental needs. Most children start closer to age 2. Before you should introduce a child to potty training, there are some benchmarks that they must reach in their progress:

Sitting still. When your child is go-go-go in the early stages of walking and mobility, they may not be ready to learn the process of perching on a potty for longer than a minute. A child eager to get up again isn’t ready for potty training.
Saying “No”. While the idea of hearing loud NOs seems counter-intuitive to potty training, this is a good sign. A child that can assert themselves is beginning to develop a sense of self-control.
Putting things back. If your child has begun to grasp the idea that X belongs in Y around their environment, congratulations– that’s a necessary step to your child’s understanding of where waste goes and why. If they are still throwing away toys and then crying that they can’t get them, they haven’t grasped the permanency of the potty yet.

The key to successful potty training is to have the patience to let the child show you when they are ready, instead of anxiously promoting potty training before the time is right. Here are some of the signs that your child may be ready for potty training:

Retaining. A child with a dry diaper may be associating shame or discomfort with voiding and have begun trying to keep it from you. Awakening dry from a nap may also be a sign that they are retaining.
Pooping in secret. Sometimes children pick up on our disgust for the waste itself and worry about our reaction to seeing more poop. They will find a dark corner to void their bowels to avoid upsetting us, compounding the child’s mental discomfort. It’s usually an indication that a parent needs to lighten up a bit, and the child needs assurance and positivity.
Copying. It’s a good clue that when you see your child sitting down to poop the way they’ve seen you or siblings do, they may be ready for some assistance in how to use a potty.
Pulling down a wet or dirty diaper. Trying to remove their own diapers might indicate that your child is independently trying to manage their waste, although it can just be skin irritation.
The direct approach. If your child tells you they are about to go, are going, or have gone, then they are absolutely ready to begin potty training.

At Creekside Kids, we recommend using the Braselton Toilet Training Method. It’s a gentle, natural way to bring a child into potty training. The trick of the Braselton Method is to associate pooing with the toilet and let the child think it was their own idea.

It begins when you see enough signs to convince you that your child is seriously ready to start. Take your child to select their potty from the store so that it is something good and just for them. Choosing their own toilet is as much about identity as it is an introduction to the concept of privacy. Over time, the child will sit on the potty entirely independently without any prompting from you.

There’s no need to stress the need to take down a diaper in your child’s first few attempts. It’s a moment for celebration! The act of your child sitting down on the toilet means they correctly associate the potty with voiding and that they’ve graduated to pulldown diapers. Once they adjust to pulldowns, you can show them how to pull their pants down. When your child eventually voids, they will do it by making the association and thinking it’s their idea, their own choice.

We want to thank Autism Community Training and Huggies Pull-Ups for some of the great ideas in this article. If you’d like to discuss a place at Creekside Kids for your kids, we’d like to invite you to click this embedded link to schedule an appointment. Let’s get to know each other! We’re located at 1201 W Cheyenne Road, Colorado Springs, CO 80906, and we can be reached at (719) 635-9111. Our regular hours of operation are 6:30 am until 5:45 pm, Monday through Friday; however, we have a shortened schedule during COVID of 7:00 am to 5:30 pm.

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December and Helping Your Child Through Stress and Meltdowns

Exploring The Outdoors In November

Why Playing With Costumes Is Good For Children

No Pressure Potty Training

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